December 02, 2009

Hemingway and the Liar

There is never any end to the things that come out of Noah's mouth. He only sleeps for 9 hours a day total (no wonder the kid won't grow) and the other 15 hours of the day (it took me way too long to do that math in my head) he spends talking. And talking. And talking. And always wanting a response. And if you don't respond immediately, he asks over and over and over again. You get the cycle. When you talk continuously, you are bound to say some funny things every now and then. However, with Noah, the line between funny and downright embarrassing is a bit blurry. For instance, earlier in the week, Noah and I were enjoying a really great afternoon at the mall. I had to duck into Sears to use the potty. I always try to be as speedy as possibly because in the short time it takes me to go, Noah will invariably unroll all the toilet paper or pop his head under the divider to "take a peek" at the lady in the next stall. However- this time, no sooner had I unzipped and started to hover over a germy public potty, did Noah scream "Mommy- how come girls pee-pee out of their bottoms instead of using their wee-wees?" I managed to jet out of that bathroom before anyone could look at me and wonder if I was transgendered or something. (Not that there's anything wrong with that!)

And sometimes, if you talk all the time, you are bound to tell a little lie every now and then. Like this morning at the vet. (Yes- we were at the vet again- as a side note the dog is now on Prozac- thank God! Anybody in the market for a psychotic lab?) We walked in and the vet asked how Emma, the dog, was and Noah answered, "She's a crazy girl!" (very accurate) He kept asking if where we were was a vet or a doctor. We tried to explain to him that it is a doctor for animals. The vet told Noah that they helped dogs and cats and farm animals. He asked if they helped horses. The vet said that they did and did Noah have a horse? He said, "Yes." (Very inaccurate.) So the vet's next question was what color was Noah's horse. Without any hesitation he told her that his horse was brown. Then she asked if Noah's horse was in a barn. And he said, "No- we keep her in the street." Little booger!

So while Noah tells tall tales, Sadie has started writing stories of her own. She loves to write. (Wonder where she gets that from?) She used to sit at the kitchen table and write the words that she learned in kindergarten over and over again in every color crayon. In the last couple of weeks, she has figured out that she is not limited to the 30 or so words she's learned at school, and that she can try to sound out the letters to make her own words. And she's been doing just that. She will spend hours just writing and writing- mostly letters to little ole me. She's come out with some really cute stuff lately. Here's a little sample of her work.

Translation: Mommy, I love how you are so sweet on Thanksgiving. Is she insinuating that I am not sweet the other 364 days of the year???

Translation: Going to the waterfall. Have a marvelous Tuesday. Love, Sadie

This is the sign she made for her beauty shop a few days ago, where she gave me a makeover. Translation: Jewelry Shop. Does hair, lip gloss and eye shadow.

I may have the next Hemingway on my hands. Or an entrepreneur. Or, or, or, the possibilities are endless!

*Don't forget to get entered in the Pampered Chef giveaway! You only have until tomorrow to get entered. I am making the executive decision to end the giveaway a day early on Thursday 12-3 at 7:00 pm. I forgot that we are traveling this weekend and I am not always able to hack into some wi-fi from the grandparent's house. Winner will be announced Thursday night! Good luck!

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