December 24, 2009

Rollercoaster

I've been having a hard time trying decide exactly how to blog this week. There is so much going on. My grandfather is still on a ventilator in the ICU. Some days there is more hope than others. This is the first time in my life that I've been this close to losing an immediate family member. So it's been hard. Really hard. Especially at Christmas time. We are a very close knit family- and despite all of our faults and quirks, we are always there for each other- no matter what. The waiting room at the hospital has been one continuous family reunion and it is really great that we can all draw strength and comfort from one another. I'm not sure what the future holds for my grandfather- I'm not even sure how to pray for the situation anymore. And that has clouded all the holiday festivities this year. Our days of doing our Christmas Kindness projects were derailed somewhere around day 8. But that's okay. Right now there are more important lessons to teach my children. They need to see that despite the busyness of the holidays, you stop your whole life when your family needs you. That no matter what else is going on or no matter what other plans you think you have, that you will drop everything and come running to rally around your family. The lesson they've seen in action this week is that your family is the first priority.

So today I am just trying to take a breath and take it all in. Exhaustion set in a few days ago, but life goes on. I am trying to make sure that Christmas is still magical for the kids. They are like night and day about Christmas. Last night while we were saying our prayers, Sadie wanted to pray about Jesus' birthday. And thank you for baby Jesus and so on. I swear- that girl just radiates goodness. I keep waiting for rainbows and fairy dust to come out of her butt. Noah on the other hand just wanted to pray about Santa and the presents and dear Jesus please make sure I get lots of presents. Noah's biggest fear for the past few days is that he would end up on the naughty list. He has not made a move in days where he didn't first ask, "Mom, if I throw this toy will I end up on the naughty list?" I have pretty much controlled him like a puppet master with this fear of the naughty list. Do I feel guilty about manipulating my child like that? Nope- not a bit. I have totally become that mother I swore I'd never be!

And on the adoption front, we have a little news. The consulate in Kinshasa (the capital city in DRC) has logged our paperwork, but has yet to give us an appointment. That is the next step. The consulate will give us a date that we can meet him and he will essentially say- "Yep- you're done. Take this kid out of here." We are hopeful that this date will be the end of January. Which means that hopefully we will only have to wait about another month to meet our baby boy. And we now know Miles' birthday. Are you ready for this? His birthday is the 4th of July. He's our little independence baby. That means that legally he is only 5 months old. We know that he is a little older than this, but this is the date that his government arbitrarily set, so that is the day that we will celebrate. Plus- that date has special signifigance for us. We made our public announcement of our adoption on the 2nd of July. But we signed our first papers to get this all rolling on the 4th of July. I just know that this was destined to be our child from the very beginning. Noah's birthday is on Halloween. So now we have a goblin child and a freedom child. I love it.

Since I've been in crisis mode for days and haven't had time to share it, here's a little recap of a funny incident that happened in our house last week. This one makes me look bad, but dear readers- I love y'all so much I'm willing to put my ugliness out there for your enjoyment. Last week I had a pimple of epic proportions. It was right smack in the middle of my forehead. I can not convey to you just how enormous this thing really was. The kids and I were sitting on the floor reading a book when their curiousity over the protrusion on my forehead took over. Noah kept touching it and saying, "Mom! What is this thing?!" I told the kids it was a zit. I guess Sadie had never heard that word because she kept saying, "No, what is it really?" I told her again that it was a zit. Noah thought about this for a while and then said, "No- it's not a zit. I'm pretty sure it's a clock." It was about the size of a clock. No joke. So they collectively decided that I had, indeed, had a clock implanted on my face. Sadie said, "Mom- that clock is pretty bad. You probably better go to the doctor about getting it taken off." Maybe they'll get me some Proactive for Christmas! Merry Christmas, all!

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