December 02, 2011

Which brings me to my next dilemma...

* Miles is on the mend.  After the first 24 hours, he was in minimal pain.  The swelling around his eye seems to go down by the minute and there is no sign of infection!  Whoop Whoop!  I have, however, made up my mind that I will demand that they give him baby Xanax before we take him in to the hospital for the second surgery which is scheduled for 10 days from now.  Which leads me to my next dilemma...

* Miles is supposed to be doing minimal activity.  He is feeling fine and wants to run around like the nut that he is but he runs the risk of popping his stitches if he's too active or bangs into or gets poked by another kid.  Keeping him calm is exhausting.  He has watched Cars no less that three times each day but he's getting restless and so am I.  I swear, if I hear "Life is a Highway" one more time, I may just get on that highway and drive straight to the bottom of a lake.  Since being around other kids is not an option yet, I can't send him back to school and it is driving us both crazy.  While the big kids were at school today I decided that we could NOT stay in this house another minute (I realized that as of yesterday I had only gotten dressed once since Thanksgiving.  Gawd.)  I caked his eye with antibiotic ointment, loaded him up and we went to run a few errand and get some fresh air.  Which leads me to my next dilemma...

* Without giving TMI- it is that time of the month when a certain little visitor comes.  I had to go into the bathroom to take care of a few things while we were out and about today.  Being in a tiny bathroom stall with a kid who is all up in your biznass at any time is unpleasant, but especially when it is that time.  Can I get an amen, ladies?  I was trying to be quick and discreet.  But nothing- and I mean NOTHING gets by Miles.  About 30 seconds into this ordeal he starts saying on repeat, "OH NO MOMMY!  IS YOU'S NOSE BWEEDIN'?   (Ummmm... yes dear, that is exactly what is happening here.) Then he frantically tried to hand me wads and wads of toilet paper.  It truly was such a special mother/son moment.  *gag*  Which brings me to my next dilemma...

*  Our next stop was TJMaxx to buy some books for my nephew for his birthday.  My friend texted me and asked what I was doing.  This is my autocorrect highlight of the week.  The conversation:

Friend:  What are you doing?
Me: TJMaxxing with mules.
Friend:  Mules?!  Wow!  Sounds exciting.  Hee Haw!

So what was supposed to be TJMaxxing with Miles now put me shopping with a whole bunch of mules.  Lovely.  Now I can not get a picture out of my head that looks something like this:

Which brings me to my next dilemma involving animals...

*Sadie asked Santa for a micro pig.  Noah asked Santa for a guinea pig. ( He also asked for a meerkat) What the freckle?  Not sure what is up with my children and their desire of all things pig, but it ain't happening.  I'm entertaining the idea of hamsters.  But how does one say, "Santa doesn't care that you want a genetically altered swine, here's a nice hamster instead"?  I have a feeling it will be like breaking little kid hearts left, right and center on Christmas morning.  I also kick puppies in my spare time because I am pure evil.  Mwah ha ha.  Which brings me to my next dilemma...

* If a mom does an evil supervillan laugh in her kitchen and there's no one there to hear it, does she really even make a sound?  Hmmm... 

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