February 17, 2012

These People Embarrass Me

It's true.  Sometimes my family embarrasses the crap out of me.  For instance...

Miles and I were strolling around Garden Ridge the other day.  It was just a mommy and Miles date and he was sitting in the cart talking a mile a minute.  He talked to every person that we passed.  His speech went something like this.  "HI!  I'm Miles.  I fwee yeeas owd.  I go school on da bus.  I a good boy on da bus."  Women go nuts over this and tell him constantly that he is the cutest thing that's ever lived and he eats it up every single time.  But then we turned to go down an aisle where a VERY large African American man and his wife were looking at some artwork.  Miles pointed at that man and shouted, "Wook mom!  It's a big gowilla! (gorilla!)"  I wanted to crawl in a hole.  All of our talks about race and how we are all different and all that jazz went right out the window.  The man was either deaf or he sensed my mortification and he didn't comment on my son calling him a gorilla.  As we wheeled our cart the other way, Miles began beating his chest and saying oooh oooh aaaah aaah as he pounded on himself.  God help this child reach adulthood.  No seriously- God help him.

It's a good thing he's so darn cute.
Later on the same day, I was driving both boys to the grocery store.  They always play this game called yellow jacket sting while we are in the car.  You simply yell out "Yellow Jacket Sting!" any time you see a yellow car and if you are the first one to spot it, you get a point.  This game drives me crazy because the boys are ultra competitive and fight over every single sighting.  We got into the store and Noah decided that he needed to concoct a game to pass the time in the supermarket.  All of a sudden he yells out, "OLD PEOPLE STING!"  Miles caught on quickly and before I knew it they were claiming every elderly person in the store one by one.  There was no stopping it.  Well, actually there was.  We ended up having to leave with only some carrots, a head of lettuce and toilet paper.  We will now be known around town as the family who yells at old people and large black men.  Shoot me now.

Sadie got her very first zit this week.  It was right smack in the middle of her cheek.  Her only comment about it?  "Mom, now people will really think we look alike."  Thanks, honey.  You are too kind.  Really.

And then there is my husband...  My husband's home office sent him an email about his trimester bonus.  We had big plans for this bonus.  We paid off the last of Kamron's student loan (yahoo!) and knocked out the last of some of those lingering adoption costs.  That email that Kamron got had some sort of tax information about our bonus on it.  The taxes were ridiculous so Kamron wanted to forward me the email and go on a little rant about it.  Instead of forwarding, he hit reply instead and send his rant about the taxes back to the home office.  Now- that's not the bad part.  In addition to the rant he wrote, "How about a debt relief lunch celebration tomorrow where we make the calls and/or send in the payments together? I know that might be hokey, but I'm so excited about this I feel like we should celebrate."  So he essentially asked his home office lady on a date and asked her to make calls with him and celebrate getting out of debt.  She seemed very confused by the whole thing.  We were seriously embarrassed.

I can't wait until all these people are old enough for me to embarrass them.  It is going to be epic. Mwahaha.  

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